Howler monkey walking on brick wall with green forest in the background

21 Days Is The Time It Takes To Break A Bad Habit

I am just returned from a 21 day reset in Costa Rica; my soul’s other home. The hot dry days, the wild ocean, the stunning sunsets. The crazy abundance of animals – from baby monkeys just learning to trimble tromble through the canopy on their own to the aggressively friendly coatimundi…the flash and call of the resplendent quetzal in the rapidly declining ecosystem of the cloud forest, the shark I accidentally rode waves with and the 2 baby screech owls (we named them Mira and Taj) who lived in plain view of our window for our 1st week…Whoa! The unforgettable COVID gift was a lack of crowds clamoring to see the sights and a connection with the grace of the Costa Rican people I have not experienced in many years…what a precious moment. While I can’t imagine why I am so blessed I can tell you what a beautiful and helpful thing it was to step away from ordinary time, speed, demands, and make seeing sunset every night, watching the tide rise, and staring out over a vast horizon my top priorities.

Twenty one days is the time it takes to break a bad habit. Instead of breaking bad habits (other than being an over-busy human like most folks), I created habits of living fully within the natural rhythms of day and night. Now the question is, how do I maintain my good habits?

Well, first, I have the good habit of starting my day in silence and slowly, so my practice from there is to stay slow—rushing, tolerating being overloaded and pushing through are all ways we betray our own sense of right rhythm.

Then, discern, discern, discern. One of the places I repeatedly confuse myself is in trusting that what Life asks of me is what is wanted—no more abdication—Life will not discern for us and will generously offer more opportunity and abundance than we can possibly engage with…so it is up to us to use our vessels and our perception to choose off of the menu—just because it’s on the menu doesn’t mean we need to order (or eat) it!

Last, live in ceremony—the small difference between an ordinary action and a ceremony is the intention and attention we apply. Apply intention and attention and the sacred rises (interestingly so does our attention span…so the habit of needing a lot of action, entertainment and things to keep us distracted will go down and we can then be right here in this moment and stay a minute.)

In the meantime, yes, oh my goodness, April Fools are everywhere—the tender and innocent rises of Life; buds, tendrils and baby creatures are in every nook and cranny here at PrayerFarm. 
Maybe you want to come up for a work and play and covid-safe work party on Sunday April 10th to see for yourself! And, much is rising for you to participate in—from an online Friday night Constellation Event Friday April 9th to 2 different Tune Up Series—jump into community, weave yourself into the web, grant yourself the support, care and connection you long for. 


lexi delgado

P.S. If you are inspired to read more of my writings, you can find them at

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